TOP 30+ BEST FUNNY METEOROLOGY JOKES COLLECTION FOR THIS WEEK

Find The Best Funny Meteorology Jokes If Your Answers Is Yes. Here Is A Big List Of Funny Meteorology Jokes Collection For This Week.

  • I signed up for some Meteorology courses.

MET 104 Standing in Deep Water

MET 105 Standing in Heavy Rain

MET 106 Acting Amazed

  • During a drought, a farmer remembers hearing about a native tribe who’s rain dance is said to work every time…

so the next day he gets in his pickup and heads out to visit the tribes chief.

When he gets there he asks if the tribe would be able to preform a rain dance for him.

“Yes, we can call the spirits of water with our dance, but first I must gather the tribe, and my son is two states away at a collage. Before I call him home, however, I must ask you what you have to offer in return, and that before you offer remember that it must be paid to the whole tribe.”


“Ok” said the farmer ” how does 10% of my crop sound, I grow corn, wheat and carrots and that should be enough to feed about 100 people for a few months.”

After a moment of thought the chief replies “We cannot possibly use that much, we can take 5% of your crops, and if you can give the other 5% as cash so we can buy other supplies it can be done.”

“Deal” replied the farmer.

After speaking to his son on his cellphone, the chief arranges everything to take place the following weekend. When the time comes the tribes start dancing, for two hours the chant and burn herbs, and miraculously the skies start to darken and the clouds let out a torrential downpour.

When the time comes to pay, the chiefs son comes around with a trailer to pick up the food and money. After all is said and done the farmer starts to make some small talk and says:


“Thank you for coming down from collage help with the dance, what are you studying?”

“Me? No, you have me wrong, I am not a student, I am the professor of meteorology”

  • A Good Detective

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are camping together. When they go to sleep, Sherlock says, ‘Tell me what you can see when you’re looking up?’
‘Thousands of stars,’ says Watson.
‘And what’s your conclusion from all this?’
Dr Watson starts to think. ‘If I consider it from astrological aspects,’ he says slowly, ‘I must assume that there are millions and millions of stars and galaxies in the universe. From psychological points of view I conclude that we’re so infinitely small in comparison with God’s overall creation. And if meteorology is concerned, I would say that we can expect fine weather tomorrow. What’s your opinion?’
‘You’re a fool, Watson,’ Holmes says. ‘Our tent has been stolen.’

  • How come it never rains inside a barn?

It’s a stable atmosphere.

  • What did the Irish meteorologist name the stream behind his house?

The Mary O’Donnell Flow

  • What do meterologists get after a long night of tequila and bad tacos?

Rear flank downdrafts.

  • Why did the meteorologist paint a big blue “L” on his house?

He wanted to be an area of low pressure.

  • If Jeff Foxworthy had invented the WISR-99, what might he have called it?

Necks Red Radar.

  • What do they call the main conference room at The Weather Channel?

The Topical Convergence Zone.

  • What do meteorologists call a row of martinis?

The Dry Line.

  • Where do meteorologists go after work?

The Milli-Bar.

  • What happens at the Milli-Bar?

Downpours.

  • What if the Milli-Bar was at zero degrees latitude?

It would then be the Equatorial Trough.

  • What happens when meteorologists get a promotion?

They get caught in an updraft.

  • What happens when a male meteorologist forgets his anniversary?
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An approaching cold front with explosive storm development.

  • What do you call a meteorologist super hero?

Adiabatman

  • What does a meteorologist call a Harley Davidson showroom?

Chromosphere.

  • What do meteorologists call PMS?

Conditional instability.

  • What meteorological condition is known as a “Marie Antoinette?”

Cut-off High

  • What meteorological condition is known as a “John Bobbit?”

Cut-off low.

  • What does a meteorolgist cry before he tees off?

Fore-cast!

  • Did you here about the meteorologist who became Emperor of the South Pole?

He had a Freezing Reign.

  • Who cuts a meteorologist’s hair?

A Canadian Clipper.

  • Why do meteorologists like to eat snow pellets?

They have a sleet tooth.

  • Why is the DEA suspicious of meteorologists?

They keep talking about Canadian Highs.

  • Why did the Puerto Rican Meteorologist go for counseling?

He had a tropical depression.

  • What’s the difference between a politician and a Santa Ana Wind?

Is there one?

  • What does a meteorologist’s wife call the point at which the force of nagging overcomes the inertia of a day off?

The “Do” point.

  • What is the only sound heard by a meteorologist in love?

A Beau echo.

  • What do you call a meteorologist who uses a psychic?

The Weather Channeler.

  • What do you call a group of NEXRAD experts?

Dopplergangers.

  • How do meteorologists coats wear out?

They develop Gore-Tex breakdown.

  • What do you call meteorologist DNA?

Supercells.

  • What’s different about a meteorologist’s dandruff?

Crystalline flake structure.

  • Why do teenage boys want to become meteorologists?

Because they get to work with weather models.

  • What did the male raindrop say to the beautiful female raindrop?

-I’m falling for you

  • What do raindrops get if they go to an event that is cancelled?

-A sun check

  • What is the most popular game played by tornadoes?

-Catch my drift

  • What is the most popular sport played by raindrops and hail stones?

-Diving

  • Where do lightning bolts go on dates?

-To cloud 9

  • Where do hail stones go on dates?

-To hell

  • Where do wind gusts go to on dates?

-To Chicago

  • What do clouds want to be when they grow up?

-Thunderstorms

  • What do hail stones want to be when they grow up?

-Coins, playing balls or fruits

  • Where do clouds go to the bathroom?

-Anywhere they want

  • What awards are given at the tornado Oscar awards?

-Best hoser

-Best wedgie

-Best train noise imitation

-Best imposture

-Best twist and turn

-Best supporting wall cloud

  • In the summer desert heat, what did a dust devil say to the over-talkative dust devil?

-You are really blowing a lot of hot air

  • HURRICANE

A weather intern walks into a bar and asks for a Cold Draft. Suddenly the bar door swings open and gusty cool air fills up the bar. After drinking his Draft things seem to get back to normal. The guy then orders a Thunderclap on ice. Suddenly the roof gets pelted with hail stones and an intense lightning flash and thunderous explosion rock the bar. After drinking his Thunderclap things seem to once again get back to normal. Feeling rather good at this point he asks for a third drink- ordering a Tornado on the rocks. This time the bar is not only pelted with even larger hail stones but ferocious winds rip the door off its hinges, shake the bar violently and break every window. Feeling extra good and cocky at this point he then orders an extra large and extra strong Hurricane. The bartender after this request looks up at the guy perplexed and says, “Sorry fella, we have no Hurricanes in Kansas”.

  • What is it called when a high pressure goes on vacation?

-A Hiatus

  • How do high and low pressure systems greet each other?

-A high says “Hi” and a low says “Hello”

  • Why did the tornado get arrested?
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-For speeding, theft, vandalism, assault and murder

  • Where is a tornado put in jail to be punished?

-In a high pressure cell

  • How do lightning bolts flirt?

-They electrocute each other

  • How do thunderstorms invest their money?

-In a combination of liquid assets and frozen assets

  • Why can’t meteorologists forecast the weather?

-They are too busy studying comets and meteors

  • Famous quotes from clouds:

-“To condense or not to condense, that is the question”

-“Let the wind be your guide, always follow the wind”

-“Be sure to stay in shape”

-“If you gotta go, you gotta go”

  • How easy is it for wind gusts to talk to each other?

-It is a breeze

  • What type of music do lightning bolts listen to?

-Rock and Roll

  • Thought of the day: How much rain could a rain cloud rain if a rain cloud could rain rain
  • Why do tornadoes move so erratically?

-They are dizzy

  • PERFECT FORECASTS

A veteran broadcast meteorologist walks into a bar. He notices a new bartender. Over the course of his drink the broadcaster learns the new bartender is an Aggie who moved from central Texas. The Aggie bartender complains about how none of the meteorologists in Texas could get the forecast right on a consistent basis. After hearing this, the veteran broadcaster wagers a bet with the Aggie. He says, “I bet I can correctly forecast the sky conditions for tomorrow and get the high temperature correct within 2 Fahrenheit degrees”. Amazed with this type of forecasting accuracy the Aggie tells him that he is on. If the broadcaster wins the Aggie will give him a free beer on the next trip to the bar and if the Aggie wins the broadcaster has to buy the two most expensive mixed drink on the menu. The veteran broadcaster gives his forecast: sunny skies with a high of 103 F. The next day the broadcaster comes back to the bar. The Aggie already knows he has lost the bet and has the free beer ready since the skies were sunny all day with a high within just 1 Fahrenheit degree of 103 F. The Aggie figures that the broadcaster must have just had a lucky day. This time the Aggie makes the bet, which turns out to be the same bet again. The following day the Aggie is astonished that he has lost again. Each day for the next 2 weeks the Aggie makes the same bet but the broadcaster always predicts the correct sky conditions and the high temperature is always within 2 Fahrenheit degrees. After giving away so many free beers the Aggie finally asks the broadcaster how he is so incredibly accurate at weather forecasting when all the Texas weather forecasters could not get their forecast right on a consistent basis. The veteran broadcaster with a confident smirk on his face says, “You just gotta love this persistent Phoenix, Arizona June weather and I have the talent, personality and experience to forecast it correctly”. The Aggie, still perplexed, pours him another beer.

  • TRUE AMAZING HAIL STORY

An Aggie weather professor and two students rent a university van and head out for a couple of days on a storm chase. These two students flunked his storm spotter training course so he wanted to get the students up to speed on chasing by taking them out into the field. While they are driving just south of Abilene, TX they see a huge storm firing up toward the west of their position. The Aggie decides to let the students position themselves to get the best view of a potential tornado. The Aggie figures that sometimes it is best for students to learn the hard way. The Aggie tells them to position themselves just as they were taught in storm chase training. Disappointed, the Aggie watches the students drive right into the downdraft of the storm. They get pelting with high wind and heavy rain. A couple minutes later they are caught right in the hail core. Having basically no visibility and the hail size only getting larger he has the students pull over to the side of the road under a tree by a huge ranch. Once the hail subsides, the two students make a bet with each other. It is a $20 bet to see who can find the largest hail stone in the next 20 minutes. They go off in different directions with their coolers. The first student finds mostly quarter and golf ball size hail stones. However, toward the end of his search, he looks down and sees the largest hail stone that he has ever seen. In awe he picks it up and places it into the cooler. The second student also finds mostly quarter and golf ball size hail stones as the largest ones. He dumps his hail stones out however upon finding the largest hail stone that he has ever seen. Both students rush back to the van to show off their bet winning hail stones. Upon arriving back to the van and comparing hail stones they can not decide whose is larger. Having no scale, the students decide the only way they are going to be able to determine whose is larger is to melt them down to see which one fills up a larger volume in a measuring cup. The Aggie and students drive out to a campsite to set up camp and eat. After getting a fire lit, the students decide that this will be the time to melt the hail stones. They each put their hail stone in a pan and place it above the fire. The Aggie calls the students back over to the van so that the students can look through some weather data to decide where to chase the next day. The students ask the Aggie to watch over their melting hail stones. Once back to the campfire, the Aggie decides that this would be a good time to also cook up some dinner. He gets out a few juicy steaks and finds an empty pan to cook them in over the fire. The students finish up their analysis and walk back over to the campfire. The students are horrified to see that there is no melted water in the pans. In fact, there is nothing in the pans. The Aggie calls them over saying that dinner is ready. The students question the Aggie professor about where the water is from their hail stones. The Aggie says he does not know about any water but that the steak and ostrich egg omelets are ready to eat.

  • How is a hailstone like an onion?
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-They are both whitish and have layers

  • Why were the watermelon and pumpkin jealous of the pea?

-There is no category called watermelon or pumpkin size hail

  • Why did the Aggie take a golf club and a baseball glove storm chasing with him?

-To golf the golf ball size hail and catch the baseball size hail

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